UNITED STATES — When a warning went out that there was a possibility of a mass casualty event yesterday, everyone involved in a local large gathering of people were put on the highest of alerts.
“We want everyone who will be gathering this evening to be even more vigilant than you already are,” the local police chief warned, “This has the potential to be a very dangerous situation.”
The persistence of the American people to not let the terrorists win was on full display as not one person who was RSVP’d on Facebook to attend the meet-up failed to make it. The event started out as a grand example of the strength and solidarity of humanity showing that We The People would not be afraid of the outlandish threat of those too scared to enjoy the beautiful freedom and liberty Americans are so generously granted.
Then things got real.
The first reports of trouble were called in about 9 PM local time. Initial reports from the local police scanner showed there were multiple calls of a heavily armed gunman walking down the main street of the downtown area, just a block from the event.
Just as the possible assailant approached the gathering of people, the heroic nature of the American spirit set in. Tweets from senators from across this great country started pouring in, rendering the gunman’s arsenal completely useless.
“My thoughts and prayers are with the large group of people gathering tonight,” Senator Mitch McConell tweeted just moments after depositing his quarterly donation check of over $250,000 from the National Rifle Association. That was one of just many thoughtful sentiments sent out over the social media platform just minutes before the possible gunman reached the group.
As the assailant attempted to fire into the crowd of people, he realized his weaponry had been disabled, and cursed the quick-typing thumbs of national and local politicians everywhere. Local law enforcement agents then moved in, quickly disarming and detaining the suspect without incident.
Just like that, thousands of lives were saved. Thanks to the heroic quick thinking of a few politicians and the continued excellent work of law enforcement, another mass casualty event has been thwarted. We must remember to always remain vigilant of any possible threat, but thanks to the many thoughts and prayers of the hundreds of law makers around the country, we will always be protected from the tyranny of evil.